Social media and Bellanaija weddings
might have made relationships look adorable through pictures and hashtags and
using beautiful words to convey feelings about what seems like a made-in-heaven
relationship.
But the truth is that, relationships
are never happy hundred percent of the time like we are made to believe and
see.
Sometimes the attraction fizzles out
like a lamp without oil, the chemistry seems to be reducing and we seem to be
getting tired of our partners.
In times like these, what also keeps
us going is that we know we were in this for a reason in the first place.
That’s great. What’s greater is,
there are a million and one ways we can bring back the spark that once was
there and now seems to be dying out by the day.
Get silly- If you look back at the beginning of your relationship, you
are most likely going to remember the lots of crazy and silly things that you
both did and that caused you to laugh a lot.
These days, those things remain
memories. However, you can bring them back to ignite the fire once again.
Tell your partner, “Do you remember
that one time we did this very silly thing?”
Let them remember and laugh about it
and plan to do it again and then do it again! Bring back the old times and be
silly!
Be teenagers- Write notes; love notes, amateur poems, a few lines of how
this person makes you laugh and makes you see the world only through their
eyes.
Make out at the back of a cab in
traffic, steal kisses on that trip to the movies, make out in the cinema, do
things that are usually attributed to teenagers.
This is likely going to give you
both some sort of high that hasn’t been there in a while and make you laugh at
the teenage things you are both doing.
It is also likely going to return
the spark that’s fizzling out.
Vacations also work- I know vacations would paint the picture of some exotic
island outside the country in your heads but no, maybe not that far. Not even
that expensive.
It could be some hotel very far away
from where you live, where all you both do is stay together, spend time
together, go out to sightsee or watch movies later and talk about nothing but
you both.
This would open up a lot of emotions
and feelings and give you the opportunity to repair what might have been
damaged.
Communicate- Lack of communication usually drives people apart in a
relationship and if you are not mind readers, you are not likely to know what
the other person is thinking and misinterpret the things they do.
So open up more and let your partner
know it’s okay to open up too. A lot of things would be said, a lot of things
would be felt and a lot of emotions will be purged.
Pick a fave show- It could be Tinsel, it could be Emerald, it could be OITNB,
it could be Scandal or anything at all. Just pick a show both of you love and
enjoy it together.
It helps bonding.
My ex and I used to bond over Grey’s
Anatomy for example and we had our fave xters and talked about why we loved
them and all that.
So pick the fave show and bond all
the way.
Be Sweet- Go the extra mile to do really sweet and thoughtful things
for him/her. Buy their fave cologne when they are least expecting, surprise
them with dinner in a fancy restaurant… do anything at all that makes them
happy.
And see how they would light up and
your relationship would have its spark back.
Remember the things that brought you
together in the first place- What
was it that caused the initial attraction? Why did you fall in love with this
person in the first place? What was that thing that made you think; oh he or
she is the one for me?
Remember those things and bring it
back and watch how it would help your relationship.
What are your own ways of bringing
back the spark? Share your thoughts.
